Ugh

My favorite website, pinterest is getting ruined. Maybe it is the people following/me following them but there are things on there that I do not want popping up. Its religious stuff...if I want it I will find it (btw-this isn't the stuff I would ever look for-not in a million years-been there done that.)

Loves and hugs-suppose its better this way, I shouldn't waste so much time on there.
Erin

So much to say so little time

These are the thing I couldn't live without
-My crunchy friends that keep me focused
-The angel care monitoring system
-Medela breast pump
-Bravado nursing bras
-Disposable and non disposable nursing pads
-Protein and water
-Sleep sacks
-Nursing pillow

Things I didn't know I could live without
-Sleep
-Personal time
-Adult beverages (I have one every few days...but a gal could use a couple)

Things I didn't know I would experience
-Joy
-Worry, fear, anxiety, etc.
-Happiness to the core
-Love
-Protector
-Memory loss, of all the stress of trying to get pregnant

Loves and hugs-I have so much more to say....maybe another day.
Erin

Things are looking up

My milk is starting to flow again! Phew, that was too close for comfort. I am still low on production in the evening but I am pumping close to 11 oz during the work day. My newest issue now is my 6 PM and 9 PM feedings, I am not able to satisfy Brek so we end up finishing with a bottle (breast-milk of course) but at least the outlook is positive.

I can see why working moms give up breast-feeding so quickly.

It is hard.

I am so thankful that I have enough supply and a daughter that latches even though 50% of her feedings are from a bottle.

When I was younger I would have NEVER considered breast-feeding. Thank God I didn't have children when I was younger. He definitely knows what we need and when we are ready for new challenges.

I will leave you with the 3 month picture of Brek!

Her daddy dresses her and even puts bows in her hair...just for me!

Loves and hugs--Just happy.
Erin

Omg!

Being sick for the last five days has taken a toll on my breast milk stockpile. After tomorrow, ther will be ZERO ounces of milk in my fridge and freezer! Brek is increasingly hungry and I have nothing stored. I am officially panicking. Today, I only pumped 6 oz yes, 6 oz out of three pumping sessions. I was pumping 15ish a day at the end of last week, and I was freaking out then because she eats 20. What am I to do? I do not want that sweet baby on nasty formula.

The guilt.
The horror.
The shame.
The tears.
The spit up.
The nasty poop smell.

I am going to try to do a power pump this weekend. I started drinking mother's milk tea. I am going add a 3 AM pumping session back into the schedule. I am going to increase protein. I am going increase water to over a gallon (I already drink about a gallon day.) I could try fenugrek again but I don't think it worked.

Loves and hugs- I can overcome this, I have to overcome this!
Erin

Update

I thought I was better yesterday so I went to work....it was short lived, four hours. My friends at worked took extra care scheduling a doc appointment for me. (My doc is on vacation until February 13.)

He said the clinic did on ok job, very standard, because the infection went into my kidneys he would have done something a little different. He actually said, 'the treatment the clinic gave you is like trying to take an elephant down with a BB gun when the job clearly calls for a bazooka.'

Bazooka indeed, I was there 1.5 hours, three prescriptions, and two shots later I went home. I think I feel better, but it is to early to tell. At midnight I woke up soaking wet again but it subsided and this morning I am semi-functioning. Hope I can hold out-there are 400, 7th graders that need entertained over a four hour period today, and I am the gal that has to do it...alone.

Loves and hugs-V-Day is around the corner, are you ready? Cupid is scattering love all over our house!
Erin

I thought I was dying...

Not kidding, I have been out for the past four days. As some of you know I volunteer on the weekends so I can finish my degree, I am so close I can taste it. I woke up in the wee hours of the morning in pain. I took an ib profane didn't think another think about it. I went about my day. CC and I were on our way to dinner and I got a horrible fever (it was only a ten minute drive to the restaurant) we turned around and came home.

Sunday morning I woke up to a stabbing pain in my lower back, (so much for volunteering)comparable to delivering a baby. CC checked to see what time the clinic opens, 10:00, dang. I suffered threw fighting a fever and sharp pains. Our clinic experience was typical, bad service and sitting in the waiting room. It turns out I had a kidney infection and my white blood count was high. Because I breast feed I cannot take the 'super' antibiotics so the doc said if the antibiotics did not work I would have to be admitted to the hospital. What the crap?!? I had another fun filled, fever night, I would either wake up shivering or soaking wet. Rough night. I thought for sure I was getting admitted. As it turns out my white blood count went down, phew. But the fevers did not go away until late this morning.

Loves and hugs--My very cute daughter turned 12 weeks yesterday!
Erin